and sometimes it's tediousness after tediousness after tediousness. sometimes you are swamped with nasty hormones and mixed up neurons and existential pain that makes enjoying life difficult if not impossible, despite the fact that you know The One Who Is Hope...
how easy it is to criticize when someone is having a difficult time... when Christ is the God of Compassion, a Man acquainted with sorrows and griefs.
comforting thought. but i wonder... was He also acquainted with utter confusion and disorientation?
magnetic curtain rod for the metal door with the big window -- matte silver-tone or white;
curtain rods and curtain rings (the kind w/ clips) -- in matte silver-tone -- for the living room/kitchen windows -- one large window and two narrow;
curtain rods for the bedroom: two matching matte silver-tone or black rods, and a set of double-rod-brackets;
privacy sheers for the bedroom, in white or off-white;
clean the oil stain in the carport -- so i finally stop tracking in oil onto my kitchen floor (arrgh!!!);
find a locking storage cabinet or shed to put in my carport;
clear and stock the pantry;
20 black plastic handles for the kitchen cabinets -- if i can't find the right size, then 40 black plastic knobs -- think that would look groovy (the existing 'white' knobs are cigarette-stained-gungy.... gross);
get a household hammer (or at least find my handy dandy wee craft hammer) so i can hang up pictures;
put together and mount the ikea shelf i've had for ages (but never even opened the box); but only after i.....
....unpack a gazillion boxes~!!!!!
....and keep purging. *sighs*
somethings i've already gotten done:
found some cheap ($5 each) bed sheets that look very ikea-esque when clipped up (with paperclips and clothespins, lol, on cheap shower curtain rings) on the existing curtain rods (flimsy tension rods);
.... um, erm, i forget. (....does getting the big move done, and cleaning the old place count? lol)
projects i want to do in the coming days:
put in a flower bed under my bedroom window;
get a small compost bin;
strip and refinish my little dresser and put in my (future) craft area;
rescue my 'big' bike (ie, as opposed to my wee folding bike) from my friends garage, get it fixed, and use it.... and give the 6 or 8 or so square feet i've 'borrowed' for years from my friend's garage back to them, finally!!!!;
create a sewing area, and get to sewing...;
create my craft area, and keep my craft stuffs confined to that area;
well, i unpacked all my books. some of which were still in boxes from my previous move, and never unpacked!
and i got the bright idea (pun not intended, ha) to organize my books by 'red shelf, orange shelf, yellow shelf, green shelf, blue shelf purple shelf'.
it worked out that i had more of some colors than others, and i wanted my baskets strewn throughout, so i graded each color and blended them between shelves..... today, i'm crosseyed!
my reading nook:neutrals and yellow-to-oranges: oranges and red-to-violets (several orange books had blue on the spines also, so they are all over the right side next to the 'blue' shelf'), black books below: 'rainbow' (multicolor) books, then green-t0-bluegreen: blues and purples, and a whole shelf for my concordance and a few black/grey extras: here is the flow of colors: think it shows some of my OCD tendencies? :P
ferget hockin' a loogie, how bout hockin' a pepperoni?!
yesterday i was at a friends for lunch, we had pepperoni pizza.
at one point i started coughing then choking on my mouthful, and kinda snorted somehow, and suddenly had PAIN in the back of my nose.... after i stopped coughing i tried blowing my nose, which made it worse, so i tried 'snuffin' my nose, back toward my throat, y'know?
and eventually something came out of my nose, down my throat. it felt squarish and tasted of pepperoni. and the pain was 95% gone.
today, every now and then, i smell a 'vomit' smell.
could i have rotting pepperoni juices or pizza sauce or even cheese... in my sinuses?!?
i had a thought last night... pretty much fleshed out... and that thought was this:
'What-ifs' result only in the conjuring of the obscuring mists of fictions; aside from storytelling, they have no place in the mind of the believer resolved to stand firm in the clear and vivid reality of eternal Truth, openly bathed in salvation's Light.
my blog roll is becoming a veritable blogger roller derby... must fix that. move my craft blogs over to my... um, er, craft blog..... lol. haven't touched it for a while! :)
there's a line of a song ('hoist that rag' by tom waits) that keeps going through my head:
"The sun is up the world is flat Damn good address for a rat"
the song is poetry, the life of a pirate. ...the two lines i quoted speak to me of a recognition of one's innate depravity, and the unmerited love and grace God bestows on us, while we are yet sinners... pirates... rats. i love how God can speak to us through the most un-spiritual of songs!!! lol
...i look up and see the blue skies, and think, 'damn good address for a rat'...
...i look up and see the majestic dark clouds and electric sky, and sigh, 'damn good address for a rat'...
...i swim fresh in a cool lake, and breathe, 'damn good address for a rat'...
...i look around my comfortable home and realize, 'damn good address for a rat'...
...i hold the hand of a 'mom' who loves me, and i whisper through my tears, 'damn good address for a rat'...
...i worship with my brothers and sisters, and thank God for this fellowship, a 'damn good address for a rat'...
...i breathe a breath of air in my lungs, i'm alive... 'damn good address for a rat'...
...i'm destined for heaven. that's one 'damn good address for a rat'!!!
"oh i know i've been changed... the angels in heaven done signed my name"... (skip ahead to 25 seconds to pass over the dubbed intro). :)
Ecos laundry detergent has proven to be *extremely* aggravating for my asthma. i've rewashed and rinsed the load i did with this stuff 4 times - with products that are safe for me: other detergent, stain remover, borax, even 2 cups of vinegar! - to try to get the scent out (magnolia and lily essential oils)... to no avail. and yes, i used the amount of detergent recommended for the load.
besides the $18 i spent on the bottle, i'm going to have to throw the entire load of laundry in the garbage, which means replacing almost all of my underwear and several towels, cloths, and pillowcases. :(
natural does not necessarily mean non-toxic. and this crap is extremely toxic for me.
this is exactly what the bottle i got from canadian tire looked like:
i got a new laundry detergent today, all natural, the only scent being essential oils.... well, it's so strong, i've re-washed the load 3 times to try to get out the scent, and it aggravated my asthma badly. i had to put the bottle in a garbage bag and open my windows and leave the house. the washer is running again as i write.
i was going to go to a movie with a friend tonight, but when we got to the theatre, there was a lineup already (cheap night), and just the smell of everybodys..... scents of various sorts.... was enough for me to know i couldn't go it.
so we wandered around town instead, and i only realized when we were finally headed back to my place [to drop me off... to clarify, there's *no* solo inter-gender visiting in private for me!] that his clothes had a fairly strong scent to them... which is why i was coughing and wheezy the whole time.
this after a weekend of coping with asthma flares due to bug dope and the occasional plastic/garbage put on the campfire by someone ignorant of the toxicity of it all.... *sighs*
got prayer for it on sunday morning at the campout 'service'.... but since coming home, it's been aggravated even more than usual!!!.... *sighs*
THIS BLOG IS IN NEED OF AN OVERHAUL. there are posts from years back i would not be able to post in good conscience now. i plan to overhaul the blog, and either delete or add a disclaimer to those posts. but that is gonna take time....
The Radical Summons: "Therefore let us go to Him outside the camp and bear the reproach He endured. For here we have no lasting city, but we seek the city that is to come." Hebrews 13:13.
"The Spirit never loosens where the Word binds; the Spirit never justifies where the Word condemns; the Spirit never approves where the Word disapproves; the Spirit never blesses where the Word curses." —Thomas Brooks
"God receives none but those who are forsaken, restores health to none but those who are sick, gives sight to none but the blind, and life to none but the dead. He does not give saintliness to any but sinners, nor wisdom to any but fools. In short: He has mercy on none but the wretched and gives grace to none but those who are in disgrace. Therefore no arrogant saint, or just or wise man can be material for God, neither can he do the work of God, but he remains confined within his own work and makes of himself a fictitious, ostensible, false, and deceitful saint, that is, a hypocrite." --Martin Luther (W.A. 1.183ff)
i will not let You go: "Jacob's sense of his total debility and utter defeat is now the secret of his power with his friendly Vanquisher. God can overthrow all the prowess of the self-reliant, but He cannot resist the earnest entreaty of the helpless." --Albert Barnes
i will not let You go: "Jacob's determination did not flow from his strength, it flowed from his weakness." --Charles Leiter
