i can't, He can

i forget sometimes, that it isn't up to me
i forget that it doesn't all depend on me
it doesn't all depend on my ability

i am like the man at the pool of bethesda
wanting healing, but unable
wanting to get into the pool, but unable
watching over and over as others make it in
and are healed

is it for me? i can imagine him wondering
is healing ever going to come?
how many times has it been suggested
that if he *really* wanted healing
he would have made it into the pool by now
somehow, some way

then Jesus comes and asks,
'do you want to be healed?'
i can imagine the guys frustration
i've been here 38 years, waiting, wishing, hoping
and now this guy asks if i really want to be healed?
is he going to say, get thee into that pool, then?

he cries out, 'look, i can't, alright!?
i got me no friends to help me in
i try, but someone always gets there before me
i been trying to find my way in for 38 years
whaddya think?!... i'm just here to enjoy the view?'

Jesus does not blink at the mans frustration
He does not chastise him for snapping
He does not rebuke him for feeling some bitterness
He does not say 'hey, you have to make the first move, man'...

He simple, in His sovereign timing, made him well.

is that going to be the case for me, too, Lord?
in your sovereign timing, will You make me well, too?
You know i can't get into the stirring waters myself
i can't
and You don't rebuke me for that simple acknowledgment of truth
that i can't...
but You can
and i give You glory

it is You who speaks life to my weary soul
it is You who who give value and purpose to my broken life
it is You who gets me through each drudging day
it is You who runs me through this race
and will see me to the finish
safe in Your mighty, loving arms.

[ref: John 5]