lies from the pit. grr, they make me grumble. especially at how we recieve lies without seeing if they are true, becuase they somehow 'sound' right.... even tho they are totally wrong.
take, for example, "God helps those who helps themselves". what a totally demonic, evil lie from the pit, designed to get us to strive in our own strength.
the truth is really, "God helps those who realize they can't help themselves".
i think i can do it myself, God's not gonna step in and prove it to me, He's gonna step back and say, you think so eh? so lets see how you do. He resists the proud.
wheras when i realize i am weak - not when i "feel" weak, but i realize that i *am*, existentially, weak - He is proven strong... anything good that comes through me is not of my strength, it's of His. i am unable in and of myself to do any good thing. all my righteous deed that *i* do are but filthy rags when i do not rely on Him first and foremost in the doing of them. i realize i am weak and tired and weak and frail.... and i say, Lord, if this is somehting You want me to do, give me the strength and oompha to do it.... otherwise, i know it's not something you want for me to do.
i shall not try to muster - muster up the energy, the oomph, the gusto, the willpower..... "no mustering! do not muster! ne muster pas!" ... those are His words to me. i try to strive and muster, i am sinning. He is the power source, not me. i can muster only from an empty cistern, wheras He is THE SOURCE, The Source of all things i need to do His work. the moment i am humble and realize that i, as a weak being, CANNOT muster it up for myself.... then He gives me grace, energy, ability, power to do what He calls me to do. if He doesn't give it to me, it wasn't for me to do!
He resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble. wow.
it makes me realize how my very literal physical and mental weakness has brought a revelation of this for me..... so i will all the more revel in my weakness, and not try to be, or to pretend to be, "strong". because in my weakness He is shown truly strong, and GLORIOUS!!!!!
i have friends who can just go, go, go.... and i think this revelation is harder for them to grasp, becuase they seemingly *can* do so much ..... so what is in their strength, and what is in God's? it's so unclear..... whereas, to my humiliation, i've had to realize i *cannot* *cannot* *cannot* do it on my own. i try to do it myself, and - every single time! - i crash and burn. period. even for something as seemingly simple as doing the dishes or having a shower... i cannot do it in my own strength.
the world would say, "whatchoo talkin' about, lynnie??? dishes? are you serious? get real!!!"...... but i don't care what the world thinks. i care about God's truth, period.
wow. where paul says he will all the more boast in his weaknesses and imfirmities *REALLY* resonates with me today!
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