Wednesday, December 02, 2009

more, Lord....

For Keller an idol is “anything more important to you than God, anything which absorbs your heart and imagination more than God, anything you seek to give you what only God can give.” Elaborating on the book’s title, Keller writes that a “counterfeit god is anything so central and essential to your life, that, should you lose it, your life would feel hardly worth living.” What does Keller have in mind? Well, everything: family, children, career, earning money, achievement, social status, relationships, beauty, brains, morality, political or social activism—even effective Christian ministry.
--Collin Hansen (here)

to be bluntly honest.... i struggle so much with feeling life is hardly worth living to begin with!! so this thought for me has to be turned around to... 'what i think i need to make life worth living is my idol'. hmm. i don't know.... my only ultimate answer is, "Jesus".

the 'food for thought' question in this weeks cell email was along the lines of, 'are you satisfied?', and the verses about 'come and buy' and 'the water I give you will never thirst'. and my immediate answer in my head? NO!!!! no i'm not satisfied! i'm hungry and i'm thirsty and need more. more OF HIM than i've been able to access in this life so far. which makes me yearn to leave this body and be present with Him - FINALLY. because while He is yet so close, He is still so FAR.....

there is nothing in this life that makes it worth living. there are things i hunger for, for sure: love and acceptance, for example. i also realize the only perfect fulfillment of that comes only from Him, and i will only perceive that perfectly in heaven.

what do i need to make this life seem worth living? more of HIM, NOW. it's not enough. it's never enough. more, Lord.

unfortunately, what always comes next after this thought is, "what do i need to DO to get more of Him?" and/or "so what am i doing wrong?". which reveals another longing in me, to be free from the requirement to DO.

i just want to BE.
with Him.

enough already.


the song that's popped into my head (for the first time in years)....




Clover
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Outcast, Adopted.

THIS BLOG IS IN NEED OF AN OVERHAUL. there are posts from years back i would not be able to post in good conscience now. i plan to overhaul the blog, and either delete or add a disclaimer to those posts. but that is gonna take time....

The Radical Summons: "Therefore let us go to Him outside the camp and bear the reproach He endured. For here we have no lasting city, but we seek the city that is to come." Hebrews 13:13.

"The Spirit never loosens where the Word binds; the Spirit never justifies where the Word condemns; the Spirit never approves where the Word disapproves; the Spirit never blesses where the Word curses." —Thomas Brooks

‎"God receives none but those who are forsaken, restores health to none but those who are sick, gives sight to none but the blind, and life to none but the dead. He does not give saintliness to any but sinners, nor wisdom to any but fools. In short: He has mercy on none but the wretched and gives grace to none but those who are in disgrace. Therefore no arrogant saint, or just or wise man can be material for God, neither can he do the work of God, but he remains confined within his own work and makes of himself a fictitious, ostensible, false, and deceitful saint, that is, a hypocrite." --Martin Luther (W.A. 1.183ff)

i will not let You go: "Jacob's sense of his total debility and utter defeat is now the secret of his power with his friendly Vanquisher. God can overthrow all the prowess of the self-reliant, but He cannot resist the earnest entreaty of the helpless." --Albert Barnes

i will not let You go: "Jacob's determination did not flow from his strength, it flowed from his weakness." --Charles Leiter