i have a lot to say...

i have a lot to say, but don't really know just what to say, or how to say it.... so i'll just freewrite....

i've had thoughts in my head today about the three stellar's jays i saw over the campfire this week.... right over me/in front of me. one flew in, then another.... then a third flew in, and the first flew away.... the the second flew away... then the third one ruffled its feathers and went all puffy like a blue fuzzball - no longer the majestic stellars but a fuzzy little chickie three times the size it should be... the it flew off an joined the others. and i just felt blessed i had seen them, y'know? i mean, three at once, on right in front of me~?!!! how kewl!

then i've had thoughts about how God is so amazing, and how He speaks through us in the prophetic is so amazing, and how He uses us feeble people to do His royal work... to declare His royal words..... like the dude on the cartoon castle watch tower calling out "it's three a.m. and all is well... and the fog is as thick as pea soup..."!!!

and i've had thoughts about how i get glimpses of God's big plan for my life, and when i try to figure it out it doesn't make logical sense... and so i just have to trust that DUH, not by my might or power but by His Spirit He's gonna do it so that MAKES it possible, y'know????

and i'm stoked about getting some fishing equipment and my salmon stamp in the next couple weeks hopefully... and doing some fishing... and wondering what the sun is going to do to my skin with all the time i've spent/will spend in the sun.... should i wear sunscreen and go with what the world says about avoiding skin cancer and slather on the chemicals onto my pourous, receptive skin, allowing carcinogens and neurotoxins to cross into my bloodstream transdermally, and blindly hope it's gonna prevent skin cancer?!... or just do as people for hundreds/thousands of years have done, just do what they gotta do, go where they gotta go, and trust God that everything's gonna be all right? .... i hear the ranks of churchianity crying out "be a good steward!"... but according to whose standards? the worldly medical establishment and pharmaceutical companies? /end rant, lol!

and i've been confused [and then not so confused once i heard from God about it], about my foray into 'secular' music.... (is there anything REALLY secular? can anything keep God out?) ....'oh i'm being followed by a moonshadow, moonshadow, moonshadow'... this originally by an artist known to have converted to islam.... ACK! i hear accusations of 'why would you want to sing a strange song by a person who's life stands for something so opposite of your own beliefs?'.... well, when i'm singing it i'm thinking about God, His omnipotence, His providence, His plans and purposes for my life, that i'm going to trust Him with my life.... i'm not thinking about who cat stevens is, what He believes in, etc... i'm not interpreting it to hear the enemy's voice (he's blathering on all the time anyways!), i'm listening for God's voice alone!!!! and on monday night at prayer, feeling all confused, God used those lyrics to fill me with faith, to show me the big picture, and lead me in my prayers. .... if God can speak through someone's ass, He can speak through a secular song. i mean, at least songs have words in them... most donkey's can't even speak! which is the bigger miracle??!!!! lol

and i'm thinking that i'm amazed by what God is putting into my fingers and bringing out on the piano. truly, HE teaches our hands to war and our fingers to fight, and that's what He's doing in me right now, retaking illegally occupied territory in many ways, from secular music, to old memories that left me unable to play the piano for years..... and i'm amazed i even have a piano, a remnant of my old life, but it's proven to be something God has truly redeemed for this new life.

and i keep thinking of gracie this week, and crackin' up over and over again, remembering how she looked at my shirt and said, 'lots of boh-bees~!'.... i asked her, hoping maybe i hadn't heard right, 'lots of babies?' and she scrunches up her face like i'm a doofus and says, 'NO! lots of BOOOOOOOOOOOOOB!' ....... lol~!~!~!

and i'm thinkin' now that i need to get off my duff and go have my shower before i procrastinate any longer (i hate bathing!) and wind up going to cell with greasy hair, yet AGAIN! lol

and lastly, i'm thinking that my word verification for this post is pretty funny.... nupsz.... NUPSZ? are you going to write any more, lynne? 'nupsz'. are ya gonna go have yer shower now? 'yupsz'.