Tuesday, February 10, 2009

i cannot be silent

i cannot be silent.
i simply cannot.
not when it groans within me.
not when i feel the heart of God breaking.
i cannot be silent.

oh that i would be, could be, silent...
it would be easier
life would be simpler
coasting with the status quo
refusing the challenge
...refusing to challenge.

will i be a fool for You, Lord?
yes.
though it hurts to no end?
yes.
Oh, Lord... yes.

i will be the foolish thing
i will be the weak thing
that you may confound us all.

a broken, weak vessel is what i am.
if you can use me, do.
if you can redeem my brokenness and fallibility, do.
if i am rejected and misunderstood in it, do it anyways.

You are my Healer, You are my Redeemer,
You are the One who speaks value to me.
You guard and protect me.
You will support me in my fragility.
You are forever mine...
and i am forever Yours.
do with me whatever You desire, my Lord and my King.
use Your frail servant however You choose.
my life is not my own.

i will not hold back for fear,
fear of messing up Your plan by my weakness,
for You are truly Sovereign.

therefore...
i will not be silent.
for the simple reason that
i cannot be silent.
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Outcast, Adopted.

THIS BLOG IS IN NEED OF AN OVERHAUL. there are posts from years back i would not be able to post in good conscience now. i plan to overhaul the blog, and either delete or add a disclaimer to those posts. but that is gonna take time....

The Radical Summons: "Therefore let us go to Him outside the camp and bear the reproach He endured. For here we have no lasting city, but we seek the city that is to come." Hebrews 13:13.

"The Spirit never loosens where the Word binds; the Spirit never justifies where the Word condemns; the Spirit never approves where the Word disapproves; the Spirit never blesses where the Word curses." —Thomas Brooks

‎"God receives none but those who are forsaken, restores health to none but those who are sick, gives sight to none but the blind, and life to none but the dead. He does not give saintliness to any but sinners, nor wisdom to any but fools. In short: He has mercy on none but the wretched and gives grace to none but those who are in disgrace. Therefore no arrogant saint, or just or wise man can be material for God, neither can he do the work of God, but he remains confined within his own work and makes of himself a fictitious, ostensible, false, and deceitful saint, that is, a hypocrite." --Martin Luther (W.A. 1.183ff)

i will not let You go: "Jacob's sense of his total debility and utter defeat is now the secret of his power with his friendly Vanquisher. God can overthrow all the prowess of the self-reliant, but He cannot resist the earnest entreaty of the helpless." --Albert Barnes

i will not let You go: "Jacob's determination did not flow from his strength, it flowed from his weakness." --Charles Leiter