A few minutes after returning to the room she again sought to establish her supremacy over her mother by whining and complaining. She wanted the attention being given to the visiting adults. Again she was spanked and told to be happy. When the mother returned her to their company, Caroline sat quietly for a few minutes and then, in the German Dutch language of the Amish, announced to all, “See, Mother, I am happy now.” And she verified it with a big, sincere smile.
see, mommy, i've learned that you care more about 'company' than me.
see, mommy, i've learned that i have to pretend everything's ok so i don't get hit.
see, mommy, i've learned that it's not safe to express emotions.
see, mommy, i've learned how to put on a 'happy face' mask and hide my real feelings.
see, mommy, i've learned how to conform.
see, mommy, i've learned that if i come to you sad, mad, or not feeling well... you will spank me.
see, mommy, i've learned how to put on a big smile that convinces everyone it's real.
see, mommy, i've learned to suppress 'me' into a bottle, because 'i' am not good enough.
see, mommy, i'm happy now.
yeah, right.
i think 99% of the time, when a kid is crying or acting up, there some kind of need. it may be, 'johnny's hurting me', it may hunger, tummy ache, anxiety, angry and needing help to calm down.... emotional needs. not meeting developemental/emotional/mental needs is....? emotional neglect.
can anyone say "abuse"?
see,mommy, i'm happy now...
i'm smiling on the outside, but on the inside i'm lonely, confused, hurt, broken, and simply devastated.
God doesn't beat us with a big stick and break our will and demand we conform to a cookie cutter pattern.... God gives each of us personalities, weaknesses, and He grows us up gently. He makes each of us unique. expressing who God made us to be is worship, and glorifying Him. when we err, He gently leads us back. a shepherd doesn't beat his sheep, he beats away the wolves who come to 'eat' the sheep. a Good Shepherd does not turn that rod onto His sheep. why do we thing He wants us to treat the weakest, most vulnerable, most fragile people among us in any other way that gentleness?
oh, but what about stories about shepherds breaking their sheep's legs? read this quote for a comment by shepherds. this forum thread casts doubt on the accuracy of that practice, and i actually just spend the last couple hours trying to do two things: find actual documentation/proof that breaking the legs of a wayward sheep was a methodology used by shepherds (i found none).... and actually found that if you do a web search using the keywords shepherd break leg sheep -pastor -Lord -prophecy -spanking -Jesus -God (- indicates that google is not to load one's that include that word - ie. trying to get non-religious SHEPHERDING data) there is not one reference for pages and pages of results that even mention deliberately breaking sheeps legs. try it for yourself.
[google it]
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